THIS JUST IN!

News You Neeed To Know or Not!

BEIJING, April 25 (UPI) -- Beijing officials announced a campaign Friday to hire 40,000 inspectors by May 1 to enforce a smoking ban in public places.

There are already 60,000 inspectors in the city, Sun Xianli, an official with the Patriotic Health Campaign Committee, said at a news conference at the Olympic media center.

"The idea is that the inspectors should provide a good example by not smoking in their own venues," Sun said. Yeah!

How long will it be before we get inspectors?

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Miley to pen memoir

Never mind all that nasty Miley Cyrus photo gossip going around today. Here's some happy hype from the teen pop millionaire star: she's going to write a book. Disney Book Group has just announced that Miley will share her "inspiring" story, from her roots in Tennessee to hitting the big time in TV, music and film. She'll also write about the importance of her family, show never-before-seen photos and give us all a "look at her inner circle of loved ones." It will be out in early spring 2009.

It will be a short book. She is only 15!

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SCRANTON, Pa. (AP) - Two high school seniors in Scranton, Pa., are paying a high price for their interest in politics.

Colin Saltry and Joey Daniel say they skipped gym class on Monday to rush over to a diner where Sen. Barack Obama's motorcade had just pulled in for an impromptu breakfast stop.

The two met Obama, and they say he even signed excuse slips for them to show their teachers. That didn't work. Saltry and Daniel got one-day suspensions for leaving school grounds, and Saltry has been ordered to resign as senior class president.

Our school administrators need to lighten up. These kids learned more about the election process than is being taught in the schools.

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A Phoenix man says he caused the red light display that mystified thousands of people as it floated across the north Phoenix sky Monday night.

The man, who did not want to be identified, said he used fishing line to attach road flares to helium-filled balloons, then lit the flares and launched them a minute apart from his back yard. He said he believed turbulence created by a passing jet caused the balloons to move around.

A man with too much time on his hands! Probaby retired! Retirees need to keep busy!

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Authorities announced Moorsetown Officer Robert Melia Jr., 38, has been charged with four counts of animal cruelty after allegedly engaging in sex acts with cows between June and December of 2006.

Holy Cow!

WASHINGTON - They've talked a lot of smack. Now the presidential candidates are taking it to the ring.

Democrats Barack Obama and Hillary Rodham Clinton have accepted an invitation to try to settle their long-running nomination fight primary on the World Wrestling Entertainment's popular "Monday Night Raw" program.

Clinton tells fans to call her "Hill-Rod," recites her agenda and promises to be "a president who will go to the mat for you."

"This election is starting to feel a lot like King of the Ring," she says in a little trash talk. "The only difference? The last man standing may just be a woman."

Obama borrowed the signature line from former WWE champion Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson in a warning to the special interests in Washington. "Do you smell what Barack is cooking?" Obama asks with a grin.

McCain cautions both candidates to look out for him in the general election. "Whatcha gonna do when John McCain and all his McCainiacs run wild on ya?" he asks.

It's the first time presidential candidates have appeared on WWE programing, another example of how they are using unconventional programing — from appearances on "The Tyra Banks Show" to "American Idol" — to reach voters.

How low can these campaigns go! But every vote counts, but perhaps shouldn't.

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Democratic presidential rivals Hillary Rodham Clinton and Barack Obama are complaining about which candidate is the biggest complainer.

Children! Children!

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PALM BEACH — In another sign of just how hot the mansion market is, the oceanfront estate built by billionaire businessman and philanthropist Sidney Kimmel has sold for $81.5 million, a record for the island.

Do you suppose they had to make a down payment?

CHICAGO (AP) - It turns out the golden years really are golden. Eye-opening new research finds the happiest Americans are the oldest, and older adults are more socially active than the stereotype of the lonely senior suggests. The two go hand-in-hand: Being social can help keep away the blues.

"The good news is that with age comes happiness," said study author Yang Yang, a University of Chicago sociologist. "Life gets better in one's perception as one ages."

A certain amount of distress in old age is inevitable, including aches and pains and the deaths of loved ones and friends. But older people generally have learned to be more content with what they have than younger adults, Yang said.

Right on! Take that you young unhappy whipper-snappers.

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In my home town of Marion. Indiana, they announced they are getting a Sonic Drive-in. This follows previous news that they are getting a Starbucks and a tattoo parlor.

WOW! Things are getting better on the economic front in the old home town.

Have a nice day!

Samuel

The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and leaky tire.