Wednesday, September 24, 2008

THIS JUST IN!

News You Need to Know, or Not!

SOUTH CHARLESTON, W.Va. (WSAZ) -- As if getting a DUI wasn’t enough, a man arrested for driving under the influence got in a lot more trouble at the police station.

Police stopped Jose Cruz on Route 60 in South Charleston Monday night for driving with his headlights off.

Then, he failed sobriety tests and was arrested.

When police were trying to get fingerprints, police say Cruz moved closer to the officer and passed gas on him. The investigating officer remarked in the criminal complaint that the odor was very strong.

Cruz is now charged with battery on a police officer, as well as DUI and obstruction.

OMG! Can wives now press charges? Men won't be able to because we all know woman don't fart.

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Swiss restaurant to serve meals cooked with human breast milk
Women will receive just over £3 (US$5.4) for 14 ounces of their milk.

The owner of the Storchen restaurant in the exclusive Winterthur resort will improve his menu with local specialities such as meat stew and various soups and sauces containing at least 75 per cent of mother's milk.

"We have all been raised on it. Why should we not include it into our diet?" Hans Locher, who has become Switzerland most controversial restaurant owner, said.

Mr Locher attracted the attention of the leading media of the German-speaking world this week after he posted ads looking for women donors, who will receive just over three pounds for 14 ounces of their milk.

He said: "I first experimented with breast milk when my daughter was born.

"One can cook really delicious things with it. However, it always needs to be mixed with a bit of whipped cream, in order to keep the consistency."

"They are not on the list of approved species such as cows and sheep, but they are also not on the list of the banned species such as apes and primates," Rolf Etter of the Zurich food control laboratory said.
I just don't know yet how I feel about this. I'll get back to you!

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VERMONT -- People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals sent a letter to Ben Cohen and Jerry Greenfield, cofounders of Ben & Jerry's Homemade Inc., urging them to replace cow's milk they use in their ice cream products with human breast milk, according to a statement recently released by a PETA spokeswoman.
PETA officials say a move to human breast milk would lessen the suffering of dairy cows and their babies on factory farms and benefit human health.

"The fact that human adults consume huge quantities of dairy products made from milk that was meant for a baby cow just doesn't make sense," says PETA Executive Vice President Tracy Reiman. "Everyone knows that 'the breast is best,' Oh Yah! so Ben & Jerry's could do consumers and cows a big favor by making the switch to breast milk."

Aren't people animals too? Now I know how I feel. I want to manage the barn. Bad Rotten joke. How does a breast pump sound? MMMMMMM!

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I get this," Clinton said. "My view is ... why say, ever, anything bad about a person? Why don't we like them and celebrate them and be happy for her elevation to the ticket? Especially if they are hot. And just say that she was a good choice for him and we disagree with them?" Our Bill. Always the gentleman!

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'Topless Midget Oil Wrestling' Costs Bar
Owner Plans To Appeal Ruling

City officials yanked the liquor license of a bar in Canton, Ill., for what they call "topless midget oil wrestling."

The Outskirts Bar and Grill hosted the event last month, authorities said.

At one point during the event, one of the performers took off her top. Kim Scott, the bar's owner, said she didn't know about it and quickly stopped everything once she found out.

The bar will lose its license for two months because city officials say the event violated an ordinance.

I am glad I don't have pictures.

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Farmers can find dates, or mates, on a matching website designed just for them.

By CHAO XIONG, Star Tribune

Stephanie Olson's father was leery when she told him she wanted to drive two hours to meet a man she'd met online. So she eased his concern by showing him a photo not of the suitor, but of his most prized possession -- an apple-red tractor that sparkled from meticulous care.

"The first thing my dad said was, 'It has nice rubber on it,"said Olson, 26, of Fosston, Minn. I am sure Dad was also thinking, "I hope he does too!" And from there, it was OK. I knew it was a nice tractor and well taken care of, so that would make a good impression on my dad."

It was one strategy Olson, a grain and alfalfa farmer, learned to employ in overcoming the unique challenges farmers face in the quest for love. Her first step was joining the dating website www.farmersonly.com, that unites singles with mates who can bend their game of romance around the annual cycle of planting and harvesting.

Olson met the man with the red tractor about three years ago. She had dad's blessing to trek to Fargo solo, but had one more card up her sleeve for her Romeo, Dan Klapprodt, a 28-year-old corn and soybean farmer from Toronto, S.D. (Fargo was a convenient, albeit unfamiliar, halfway point.)

"I told him I was bringing my dad with me," Olson recalled with a chuckle. "He said, 'OK, that's fine.' I had no intention of doing that; I just wanted to see what he would say."

Farmers need love too!

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The Baggy Pants Posse
Florida crackdown CRACK DOWN? nets 11 more perps for exposing their boxer shorts

SEPTEMBER 11--Last week we brought word of the arrest of Kenneth Smith, a Florida man busted for wearing baggy pants that exposed his boxer shorts. Well, it turns out that the Riviera Beach cops have been rather diligent in enforcing a new city ordinance targeting droopy shorts and trousers, according to police reports. Since officers began their crackdown last month, they have arrested at least 11 other baggy pants perps (of that group, two are juveniles). Below you'll find mug shots of eight of the other nine arrestees, aged between 18 and 36. As seen in a series of Riviera Beach Police Department probable cause affidavits, each of the males was nabbed after officers determined that low-slung pants or shorts had resulted in the exposure of between two and five inches of the individual offender's boxer shorts. While most of the busts occurred without incident, a few of the arrestees appeared bewildered that they were being arrested for a trouser-related offense. One of the juveniles, in fact, cursed out Officer J. Thornton and said, according to one affidavit, "Your a cracker and ain't got shit better to do." First-time violators of ordinance 12-3043 face a fine of up to $150.

It's about time?

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Based on the same time-honored, complex calculations it uses to predict weather, the Almanac hits the newsstands on Tuesday saying a study of solar activity and corresponding records on ocean temperatures and climate point to a cooler, not warmer, climate, for perhaps the next half century. Oh gosh an Inconvenient Truth, Al.

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Clay Aiken is gay, Lindsay Lohan is dating Samantha Ronson and Ellen DeGeneres is for gay marriage. Not that there is anything wrong with that!

Have a nice day!

Sammy C.

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